May 25, 2009
Tracking it Down
EDIT: Just going through old search terms again, and can’t believe I missed the following:
animal sex
sex
thighboot magazines
How many hits must you have to scroll through on Google after searching “sex” to get here? And as for “animal sex”, how on earth does a search for that come up with my blog? Ditto for ”thighboot magazines”, whatever those are.
——–
WordPress has a nifty little tool which allows you to see what terms people have put into search engines in order to find your blog. Over the last couple of months this blog has been getting increasing amounts of traffic, and doubtless some of it is due to search engine results. So here’s a selection of the terms used to find my ramblings.
There’s loads of “David Tenant”, “Robert Peston” and “Bad Conscience”, which you’d expect, but then there’s:
bad consiounse
and also
i have a bad conscience
which was presumably the search of somebody looking for atonement. Or there’s simply:
www.badconscience.wordpress.com
which raises the question of why bother to use a search engine at all?
There are some searches that seem plain weird:
eggs 7 cents profit
until one remembers the previous post about Catch 22, in which case it doesn’t seem weird at all. Then again, there’s:
how much can you sell tomatoes for
which frankly I don’t have the answer to and don’t believe this blog ever will.
My ravings about estate agents seem to have led a few people here:
renting agents bastards
why are all estate agents bastards?
Why indeed? But then, one does have to worry about some of the people out there:
why do we have to give the estate agent £500 no returnable deposit?
Well, I think it’s probably a case of if you have to ask, you’ll never know.
Then there’s the search terms which are slightly worrying, including:
vote for the bnp
why is police brutality bad?
and perhaps best of all:
are schizophrenic people right?
Then there’s the plain weird:
moobs surgery in Glasgow
rendered bald
i spend all income on beer elasticity of
as well as the astoundingly ignorant:
dies hiv die in soap and water?
Finally, however, there’s my favourite. I still have absolutely no idea what this search term referred to, or how it go somebody to my blog. But it did:
sex address for fuking at sagar mp
I will give a prize to the person who comes up with the best interpretation of what that means. Answers in comments.
ste for sure said,
May 25, 2009 at 12:14 pm
interestingly, its me that types the url into the search engine.
Thats cause every day I study in the uni library, and when on a break this is one of the websites i visit. The computers on the silent study floor wont let you navigate the internet normally, you have to cheat the system and use google.
So now you know….
Duncan said,
May 25, 2009 at 12:57 pm
“dies hiv die in soap and water?”
I’m revising the HIV/AIDS topic for the African politics paper, was just establishing the basics.
Seriously though, not being able to see what weird things people were searching for to get to my blog was one of the disadvantages of switching from Blogger to WordPress. I didn’t know WordPress had it at all until I saw this and checked my own ‘Dashboard’.
Interestingly, on my previous blog several of the top 10 searches of all time (i.e. in the 4 years I blogged at that site) were variations on my name and ‘kill’, ‘hate’, etc.
One of the most depressing one’s was people who arrived at my site after searching for the letter ‘t’. I have no idea how many hundreds of pages you would have to scroll through on Google to get to my site after searching for a single letter of the alphabet.
graylad said,
May 25, 2009 at 2:20 pm
Here’s my TOP TEN:
miners 352
miner 342
coal miner 165
miner porn 99
cambodian porn 55
michael heseltine 47
gay miner 41
kiddy sex 32
miner sex 24
kiddy porn 20
Not much else to say about that really.
graylad said,
May 25, 2009 at 2:26 pm
Here’s my TOP TEN:
1) miners 352
2) miner 342
3) coal miner 165
4) miner porn 99
5) cambodian porn 55
6) michael heseltine 47
7) gay miner 41
8) kiddy sex 32
9) miner sex 24
10) holland sex 20
= kiddy porn 20
Bizarre.
graylad said,
May 25, 2009 at 4:39 pm
Here’s my TOP TEN:
1) miners 352
2) miner 342
3) coal miner 165
4) miner porn 99
5) cambodian porn 55
6) michael heseltine 47
7) gay miner 41
8) kiddy sex 32
9) miner sex 24
10) holland sex 20
= kiddy porn 20
Bizarre.
Ooops, should have added great post! Waiting on your next one!
Un Important said,
May 25, 2009 at 8:08 pm
“sex address for fuking at sagar mp”
A misguided exhibitionist wants your address so they can “sex” at you, through your window. Clearly.
Paul said,
May 26, 2009 at 12:30 pm
Un Important,
Considering I work on the 5th floor of Parliament Street Monday-Weds, and the 2nd floor of the National Archives Thurs-Fri, they’re going to have quite a job.
Graham,
Serves you right for having such a filthy blog.
Ste,
Stop ruining my post with your “explanations”; they are plainly counter-revolutionary and you should be shot.
Graham said,
May 26, 2009 at 7:21 pm
My blog is filthy for a good reason.
I’d also like to mention that I did not submit that third post at 4.39pm, this is a terrible blog full of ill-thought through and self-righteous assertions. However I did post the second one as the first initially did not appear.